...Not the kind of wheel you fall asleep at...


Best Experience of the Year: MichFest with the gloriously sexy and wildly incomparable Maura and Lyndsey.

Best Soap of the Year: Mother Earth soap

Best Random Rumination on the Nature of Cookie Monster (Courtesy of Dave Hribar):

"Actually, the Cookie Monster isn't fat, either. I used to wonder how he did it. Binge-purging? Symptoms of anorexia, brought on by the high stress of living on Sesame Street? The price of muppet fame?
Then, watching closely one day, I realized that he wasn't really eating the cookies--he just picks them up in big handfuls and throws them at his mouth but never really ingests any of them. Not a crumb.
Could be it's all just a device for getting attention, and he's not really all that into cookies at all.
Could be he's just a puppet and has no digestive tract.
I lie awake at night, pondering these things."

Consonant of the Year: Q (Three-year winner)

Best Moustache-Goatee Set Drawn on an ID-Pass: Mine.

Best Chocolate Egg Plastic Toy: Tie -- Squirrelmobile and Balancing Dinos.

Best Inconsistent and Indecipherable Use of the Word "HM" in an Email: Eleven

Best Game of the Year: Set

Best Christmas Toys-Induced Elf Dance: Lesle Spisak

Best Over-Used Inside Jokes:
"Suck it."
"Smp smp."

Best Meeting Scheduled on a Microsoft Outlook Meeting Organizer and Accepted by Fellow Employees: Tie -- "The Duel at Noon" Meeting and the "Glow-in-the-Dark Sponge-Bob Band-aid Viewing" Meeting

Best Picture of a Pickle: Pickleman

Best Short Film About a Pickle: A Pickle's Day Out

Best Year of the Year: 2017.