Random "Slutty" Book I Am Reading: The Only Girl in the Car--Kathy Dobie

Three Slutty Recipes ("Quick and Easy and for Your Pleasure"):

Let me preface this by saying, I'm not really into specifics, so you kinda have to just wing it and hope these turn out ok if you try making them. Anyways, all three are real simple to make, don't take real long and (at least the first and last recipe) taste damn good when completed. Your friends/family/lovers/etc. will be impressed when you speedily whip these up and serve them.



Sauce with No Name

The ex-girlfriend of one of my grad school friends passed this recipe along to me, and it's a damn good one.

To serve four:

Two jars of Paul Newman's SOCKAROONI spaghetti sauce;
Two cubes of tofu (preferably firm or extra-firm, none of that "silken" crap);
Two frozen cubes of spinach.

Cook the cubes of spinach as you normally would, until they are thawed and warm. While they are cooking, mash/crumble the cubes of tofu with a fork until they are the consistency of loose ground beef. Pour both jars of the spaghetti sauce into a large saucepan. Throw the crumbled tofu into the saucepan and mix well. Once the spinach is done, drain it well. Then add the spinach to the sauce mixture. Cook sauce until it is thoroughly heated. It is a thick hearty sauce, almost the consistency of chili. Serve over pasta noodles of your choice (I prefer angel hair).

Variation: The original recipe calls for black beans as well, but as I have an aversion to beans (as a general rule), I've always opted out on adding them. But this is always an option--it would just require you guesstimating what would be the appropriate amount of black beans to add. However, if you DO go the black bean route, it is probably possible to serve the sauce on its own as some sort of chili dish, given that it is super-hearty and super-thick and super-flavorful.




Po-Tacos and/or Walking Tacos

This is probably gonna be the most vague, lame-ass recipe you've ever read. Enjoy.

PO-TACOS
(They used to serve these in the high school cafeteria and they were one of the rare dishes that actually tasted good.)

Large baking potatos;
Taco-stuffing ingredients (my favorites are shredded lettuce, diced tomatoes, shredded cheese, black olives, and lots of salsa)

Bake the potatos until they are crunchy in the skins. (Do NOT use a microwave as this makes the skins mushy.) I usually bake a potato at 450 degrees for about 45 minutes, but this is for one potato and is also because I have very little patience when it comes to cooking dinner on a weeknight. Once the potatos are thoroughly baked, pull them out of the oven and (very carefully) slice each one in two halves. Then with a spoon, carefully scoop out the potato-y innards of each one, leaving the crunchy skins intact. (I usually turn the innards into some sort of potato sidedish like mashed potatos or something.) Fill the potato skins with your taco fillings. (It might be interesting to try stuffing these with some veggie ground-beef that's been stewing in some nice taco-spices. I have yet to try this but have always wanted to. Again--I'm lazy.) Eat.

WALKING TACO VARIATION
(These can be commonly found at carnivals or home-days booths.)

Single-serving bags of Fritos;
Taco-stuffing ingredients.

Throw all your ingredients in the bag on top of your fritos. This may require emptying out some of the fritos in your bag. March around your house eating your walking taco with a fork straight from your fritos bag. Smile because it's fun.




Chinese New Year Cookies

1 bag of semi-sweet (or milk chocolate if you're having a particularly sweet tooth) chips;
1 can of chowmein noodles;
1 jar of unsalted peanuts.

Slowly melt the bag of chocolate chips in a sauce pan (VERY low heat and make sure to constantly keep stirring so the chocolate doesn't burn). Normally, I think you're supposed to do this in some sorta double-boiler or something, if you have all that fancy cooking equipment which I do not. But as long as you keep stirring at very low heat, you should be ok.
Once the chocolate is completely melted, mix in the chow mein noodles and peanuts (I'd say a 3:2 ration of chowmein noodles to peanuts). Keep stirring and stirring as you add them until they're completely coated in chocolate. Then scoop out in heaping table-spoon sizes and drop onto a sheet of tin foil. Allow to harden and store in the refrigerator. Makes a yummy cross between candy and cookies.

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