Ahh, the Poop Chute

A couple Saturdays ago, I was out at an Italian restaurant. At one point during dinner, a little girl the next table over leaned in towards her Dad and whispered loudly, "I need to go poop. Don't let them come and take my food because I'm gonna eat more when I get back." I stifled a laugh. Then she got up with her mom to go to the bathroom and whispered loudly again, this time to her mom, "I need to make room for more food." I laughed to myself again, musing over the fact that I'd never quite thought of it that way before, and thinking that next time I have to excuse myself from the dinner table to use the restroom, I'd have to use that line with accompanying "pushing-downwards" hand motions.

This week my mom sent me a random email about digestion:

Transit Time

The longer the transit time, the longer the toxic waste matter sits in the bowels, allowing proteins to putrefy, fats to become rancid, and carbohydrates to ferment. The longer the body is exposed to rotting food in the intestines, the greater the risk of developing disease. Even with one bowel movement per day, there are still at least three meals' worth of waste sitting in the colon at any given time.


Click on picture to see source

The body is a gross, disgusting, fascinating, weird thing.

As is Chuck Palahniuk.

Apparently, at several readings on his book-tour, the first story in his new book, Haunted, has caused people to pass out. (Read more here)

I scoffed. I chortled. I rolled my eyes.

I tracked down the infamous short story because I was too impatient to wait until the book came in for me at the library.

The story is called "Guts".

I repeat: the body is a gross, disgusting, fascinating, weird thing. Emphasis on the gross and disgusting.

Surprisingly, I was unable to make it through the end of the story. Be forewarned.

*Making "projectile-vomiting" hand motions and excusing myself to the bathroom to "make room for more food"*

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