...Not the kind of wheel you fall asleep at...

Midges & Bigheads

I find that I haven't had much to talk about lately.

Despite having done a lot in the past couple weeks.

So instead I will talk about the following mundanities:

A second wave of ants hit my apartment early Monday morning--this again resulted in a bloody massacre of smashing and stomping. I think I am growing more cold-hearted towards the buggers--I will surely become some sorta serial murderer soon, it's only a matter of time. The only good thing to come out of this situation is that most of the ants were congregated on my sticky bottle of Captain Morgan's and on a couple of sticky glasses that had been filled with alcohol and pop--this means at least a good amount of the ants died while tanked, which is a good way to go methinks.

While staring at bottle after bottle of barrier protection to keep the fricking ants out of my house, I could not help but laugh at the fact that ants have the coolest and weirdest names:
  • Argentine,

  • Pharoah,

  • Carpenter,

  • Fire,

  • Ghost,

  • Odorous House,

  • Leaf cutter,

  • Thief,

  • Acrobat,

  • Citronella,

  • Small Honey,

  • Bigheaded,

  • Crazy,

  • Field,

  • Little Black,

  • Pavement,

  • Allegheny,

  • Cornfield,

  • Harvester,

  • Pyramid,

  • Whitefooted.

  • My favorite titles for ants were Crazy ants and Bigheaded ants. You can't even begin to imagine the mental images these titles create in my mind.

    I like that midges are called "midges"--it calls up in my mind a mental picture of little 40-something housewives with curlers, muumuus, aprons, and fuzzy slippers (lit cigarettes dangling from the corners of their mouths) flitting about the outdoor of my apartment and trying to get in. Unfortunately, real-life midges aren't quite so cool. And they are draped in HORDES around the outside of my apartment. I opened my door this morning and was immediately COVERED in them. So gross.

    I have caught and released about my 7th bee since I've moved in here. God bless 'em!

    I think I'm beginning to dislike bugs.



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