I am somehow being blinded by the crazy, eyeball-withering orb of a sun shining through the windows at work FROM OPPOSITE SIDES OF THE BUILDING AT THE EXACT SAME TIME. What I mean to say is, I can see its orbosity hanging like a flaming dime on both the west side of the building and the east side simultaneously. I am not quite sure how this can be happening, as last time I checked, there was only one sun. Then again, I've been inside all day. So perhaps another one got tossed out there at some point.

Which leads me to another point I'd like to make (inappropriate, slightly incoherent attempt at transitioning):

People, if someone buys you a little Christmas present of some sort or another but you didn't get them something in return, IT'S OKAY. 95% of us are buying you the present not because we expect reciprocation but because we just wanted to, dammit. Which means it makes us feel bad when you act awkward and weird about it, as though we just took a big shit in your hat. It's called Christmas Spirit, motherfuckers--enjoy it. And for the 5% of folks who *ARE* sitting there fuming because you *DIDN'T* buy them something in return, fuck 'em. The second sun will smite them anyways.

-------