...Not the kind of wheel you fall asleep at...

More Reasons I Can't Wait to Be Done with My Workplace

  • There is swine flu information inexplicably taped to the tampon dispenser. Not the paper-towel dispenser where the woman who left without washing her hands last week could've read it. But where we go to buy things to jam up our crotches.

  • There is a pinky-sized piece of dry poo stuck to the inside wall of one of the bathroom stalls. I cannot even begin to conceive of the circumstances in which it came to rest there.

  • Someone was just shitting in the lady's room with no shoes on.



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