I Seriously Need to Get a Job as a Professional Writer of Spam...

'cause I could bust this sort of shit out like NO TOMORROW.

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friend!! Lovely invites you to visit 'Property Bulgaria'

Hi There, My name is lovely rhime, and I'm an IN YOUR FACE MONEY-LOVIN' LUNATIC. You wanna get rich buddy? Listen up ... Good guys finish last. Dead last. Nobody gets rich being nice. You got that? This is a KILL OR BE KILLED world. Got morals? Join a friggin church. I'm happy on the road to hell if I got a backpack full o' cash! I'm about to show you the dirtiest and deadliest ways to make HUGE MONEY online in no time at all, even if you know jack sh!t about computers. Look, this stuff ain't ethical .. it's definitely not nice ... and some of it is just barely legal. But it works. It works fast. And it makes mad money. Who cares about anything else! You're gonna make HUGE MONEY even if you're a complete newbie to selling online. Whether you're an advanced marketer or your kid just showed you how to fire up a computer last week, absolutely anyone can get filthy rich following my STEP-BY-STEP instructions. That's right .. I'm going to hold your hand like a baby learning to walk and show you STEP-BY-STEP how to put these money-making ideas into practice. So how much money am I talking about? I will personally strip naked and EAT MY SHOE and put the video on youtube if you make less than $2900 your first week. I'm dead serious!!
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Actually, I want to be a writer of subversive spam. People would get a message like the spam above, but then suckers would click on it in the hopes of getting rich quick, and it would connect them up with something mind-blowing and philosophical, and they'd walk away either a sudden & complete nihilist or with a mind-expansion so hardcore that they won't even be able to walk straight anymore.

LET'S DO IT! WHO'S WITH ME?!?!

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